write away the memory

its been three days and ive gotten a total of 5 hours of sleep. i have an interview for an intership tomorrow and a 7 page report that was due last month and a day too make up at the daycare i work at.im so ready for sleep im so ready for this to be over. i was in the car today with my friend and she thinks shes depressed she went to her dad and spoke to him about it because she wants help. why cant it be that simple for me. i passed the park where it happened today and i cried on the bus i cried i thought i was getting good at not crying in public unexcpectdly but i guess i was wrong i get so nerveouse i need to be better i need to be how i used to when i laughed at things were funny.and smiled when someone said something stupid i need to talk to someone but i cant i need advise but how do you get advise from someone with out talking because i cant talk about it i cant say it out loud but i can write i can write everything down and hope that writing will help but it dosnt writing the memory down dosnt make it go away it dosnt make it dissappear but i wish it would . it would be so much easier then sitting in my own thoughts day in and day out im so confused scared worried depressed and anxious all the time and unbeliveably tired i want to write away my thoughts nightmares and feelings